Testimonies & Thoughts

The other day, Avery was snuggling up to me and told me how beautiful I was. I felt so loved and appreciated her sincere compliment UNTIL I caught a glance in the mirror later that day. My hair had not been brushed at all in at least an entire day and was thrown up in a crazy looking hairdo. I had not had a shower in days and really smelled not feminine, my face was dry, my skin broken out with acne here and there, I saw wirey gray hairs here and there not obeying the pattern of my pony tail, my clothes were tshirt and sweats... I just looked so horrible. I am not saying this to come across in some backwards vain way - what struck me was that she was seeing something completely different than what I was seeing. My mind has been so tainted by the media, the actresses, the magazine covers, the ideal girl and woman photos. My mind has also been so tainted with my negative issues about myself. Her mind is capable of seeing the beauty in who I am, how I am acting, God in m

This morning, I was in the midst of a sweet time with our 23 month old son. He had just returned from the trip to take him to the nursery school, because he had "thrown up" his breakfast and we were not sure if he was sick, or just had an upset stomach. I met my carpool mom at the apartment and helped her take him and the carseat out of her SUV. I decided it would be safer, though a bit gross, to take Samuel out of his carseat and carry him with my left arm and carry the carseat with the other arm, my legs, and any other part of my body that could help me limp up the long walkway, into the apartment, through the foyer, up the elevator, down the long hall and into our apartment. Well, if you have ever carried a large booster/carseat, you can relate to how cumbersome and heavy these are. Add a 23 lb child in the left arm, and you might picture how awkard and tiring this was for me. By the time we got in the elevator, I decided it would be better to go ahead and let everyt